“PARENT-SEARCHING”
Welcome to my world. I missed you all. How have you been? How’s work, home front, and all that contributes to making you the wonderful person that you are. I really mean it, you are wonderful. Now, I like that smile, it fits your face.
You must be wondering what parent searching is about. It’s about you and I as parents. Am still learning the ropes at being a better parent and am sure you are, no matter how long you have been at it, you still want to get better-at least my parents still do.
Parent searching is in series and this is the first of many to come. It’s a series of random questions that are important in our daily lives as parents. Sometimes you never know the minute details you are leaving out. Please be sincere with yourself for the sake of your child(ren), wards and younger siblings. The questions are straight forward with either ‘yes’ or ‘no’ as answers. You might want to drop your BB, newspaper, laptop, and whatever you are doing and answer these questions. Bring out your journals or sheets of paper so we can grade ourselves. While you are at it, be sincere and remember to laugh at yourself when reality hits you, don’t be hard on yourself-we are all aspiring to be better.
Every ‘Yes’ answer=2points
Every ‘No’ answer=1point
Bon voyage or should I say bon appétit, either way, have fun and lets know what you think at the end of your parent-searching.
That kid is surely blessed to have you as his/her parent, guardian, sibling or caregiver.
THE SEARCHING BEGINS
1. Do you have self-control issues?
2. Do you see some streak of your childhood/youthful rebellion in your child?
3. Do you wish there were some traits your child didn’t inherit from you?
4. Do you recognize yourself as the most important influencing factor in the life of your child?
5. When you think of negative happenings around you, do you get scared that you are not doing your best for your child?
6. Can your children trust you for care, support and protection?
7. Do you still feel some resentment towards your parents?
8. Can you boldly say you are very or quite close to your child?
9. Is your family structure (devoid of violence, abuse, family strife) intact?
10. Are you present at important times in the life of your child (sports/games, graduations etc)?
11. Do your children see you as a terror or a friend?
12. Can they and do they confide in you?
13. Do I ask questions?
14. Do your children know that you have high expectations of them (that’s if you really have) and expect them to achieve them?
15. Do you affirm them positively from time to time?
16. Do you (can you) intentionally create time to spend with them?
17. Do you monitor their movements, friends, sexuality and all they do?
18. Do you provide adequate SEX EDUCATION instead of scary fallacies and myths?
19. Do you carefully correct them and point out consequences for their wrong doings?
20. Do you act ‘holier than thou’?
21. Can you notice a sudden change in mood of your child?
22. Do you build their self-esteem and self-worth or deflate it?
23. Are you over-bearing? Do your children always look for an excuse to stay away from you?
24. Do you still believe that virginity is still in vogue and wish your child is one?
25. Do you want to get better for the sake of your child? 
Hmmmmmmmmm……….. I heaved a deep sigh too.
45-50points------You are an ACE parent. Don’t relent. That child will definitely make you proud.
30-44pointss------HONORS parent. Keep working at it. This isn’t your best.
20-29points------BRONZE parent. Parenting is a job on its own. Press at it. It will get better.
10-19points------WOOD parent. I like the effort. Go back to the drawing board. You might be the next ace parent.
No matter where you belong, always remember that these ‘gifts’ of ours won’t always be here. Have fun, train, scold, laugh, hey include crying, argue-you are only human, sing, play, cook, etc together, WHILE YOU STILL HAVE THE TIME AND THEM AROUND.
I’m off to build castles in the sand with my 5-year old gift.
Au revoir.
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